What Else Was I Supposed To Do?

We hide because we want to be found... We walk away to see who follows... We cry to see who wipes away the tears... And we let our heart be broken to see who comes to fix it.

Is there a reason we do this?
Is there a rhyme as to why we constantly put ourselves through this pain?
We go through this pain in search of a reprieve, a glimmer of sun after the ominous storm..
And yet, when finally find a person to take the pain away...We push them away.
Find every fault in them we can, we focus on the past, and prohibit ourselves from moving on from the past...

I know I am guilty of this, and yet I can't stop myself from doing it.......

Dear past, thanks for all the lessons. Dear future, I'm ready

Dear past,

As a kid we're told, "Chew with your mouth closed,remember to look both ways before crossing the street, and don't forget to say thank you.

As a teenager we're told, "Don't do drugs, don't do this, don't do that get good grades, and reach for the stars."

And as a teenager, I am not sure what they'll tell me as an adult. At this point in my life I have been told a lot of things, been basked a lot of things, but...It's not what I've been told that matters...It's what I do with what I've been told that matters...It's how I've answered to what I've been asked. However, these decisions and answers won't tie me down to a specific future. Not everything that happens now will matter in the future. For now I just have to try to live life as it is and take certain things with a grain of salt.

I may not know how to respond to everything I am told, and I may not know how to answer every question I am asked, but for now...Dear Future, I'm ready.

Sincerely,

The Present

Well then...

Things have been fairly odd lately.
Have you ever felt super disconnected from the world?
Currently I know that something is getting to me, but I can't quite make any sense of it.
People have noticed that something is up, but I am always at a lost of what to tell them.
Then they think I am keep something from them when in reality I am not.
It's probably the incessant stress of high school and such.
Oh well...

Still I Rise

I love you Maya Angelou!

Still I Rise




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You may write me down in history
With your bitter, twisted lies,
You may trod me in the very dirt
But still, like dust, I'll rise.

Does my sassiness upset you?
Why are you beset with gloom?
'Cause I walk like I've got oil wells
Pumping in my living room.

Just like moons and like suns,
With the certainty of tides,
Just like hopes springing high,
Still I'll rise.

Did you want to see me broken?
Bowed head and lowered eyes?
Shoulders falling down like teardrops.
Weakened by my soulful cries.

Does my haughtiness offend you?
Don't you take it awful hard
'Cause I laugh like I've got gold mines
Diggin' in my own back yard.

You may shoot me with your words,
You may cut me with your eyes,
You may kill me with your hatefulness,
But still, like air, I'll rise.

Does my sexiness upset you?
Does it come as a surprise
That I dance like I've got diamonds
At the meeting of my thighs?

Out of the huts of history's shame
I rise
Up from a past that's rooted in pain
I rise
I'm a black ocean, leaping and wide,
Welling and swelling I bear in the tide.
Leaving behind nights of terror and fear
I rise
Into a daybreak that's wondrously clear
I rise
Bringing the gifts that my ancestors gave,
I am the dream and the hope of the slave.
I rise
I rise
I rise.

Day 12 - A picture of something you love.

My life wouldn't be the same if it weren't for musicals....Thank you Broadway.

Day 11 - A picture of something you hate.

Cigarettes are disgusting. The smell, the smoke, and the concept just seems stupid....Nasty.

Day 10 - A picture of your favorite sport or favorite athlete.